Opens up Google.. “How to get over my ex?”
Lets be real now, most of us have done it, some of you will do it, at some rock bottom point or another. When you have exhausted allllll other possible routes and you’re sitting there, realities hit like damn, this is it, the end of the road.
Googling ‘how to get over my ex’ is nothing to be ashamed of nor should It be laughed at, the fact that you’re already taking what must be a necessary step to move on is strength in itself, so give ya’self a pat on the back, please!
Now I’m so far from a relationship expert and I won’t pretend I have all the answers cause I don’t, what I do have are very particular set of skills, skills I have acquired.. lmao na lemme chill this is serious.. but I do have experience, in abundance! I can talk first-hand about breaks ups and handling them because I have done exactly that, handled them. I mean just look at me now all happy and shit. But yeah I’ve dealt with the type of BS you can only dream of lol but I’m grateful for it allllll cause It taught me exactly what I want, what I will put up with and what I will not stand for and let me tell you, this shit cannot be bought or taught. You have to go through it and ima thank God in advance for letting me deal with this shit young cause surely I’ve handled enough right God?
These are the steps that have worked for me, to successfully handle a break up
Remove all contact – (I do not say this lightly; this is not a test. To let go you have to do just that, let their ass go.) Honestly ive never found it easier than to just say my last piece, hear his and then explain that no contact is necessary for a period of time and to respect that.
- Delete pictures/videos – WHEN YOU ARE READY. I know a lot of people will say its unhealthy to keep them but I personally keep them until I feel ready. Don’t feel pressured into abandoning the memories, pree those cute videos, shed a little tear and then get yourself together!
- Get busy – do things that take up all your attention, preferably something you enjoy! I find that I get super motivated in the gym and will spend a lot of time focusing on that, my friend will write poetry, another will cook.. just find something that suits you and put your effort into that, I mean you’ll never know what’ll come of it…
- Show emotion – If you wanna cry, crrrryyyy. Let it all out, you’ll have nothing left eventually and tbh if you do wanna cry and you’re holding it in acting like everything is ok people will notice and you’ll become moody and depressive and just not nice to be around so just let. It. Out.
- Let those closest to you know – for me this was always necessary as my mum/friends would ask pure questions so just let them know and be clear if you want/don’t want to speak about it.
- Don’t expect closure from the other person – the hardest part. It’s in our nature to want answers but sometimes we will just not get them and this is when you have to take control. Accept what it is for exactly that, what it is. If this person cannot even give you the closure you want/need I think that’s even more of a blessing as it shows you just exactly who you’re letting go of.
- Rebound – some people will take this literal and each to their own and all that but for me entertaining the next person that’s interested and pouring all attention to them is temporarily filling a void. It’s not healing anything and will 99% of the time not last so sooner or later you’ll be back to square one. Rebound with your damn self. Self loooovvvvvving, treat yourself, spend time with yourself, find yourself.
So there you have it and If this can even help just one soul then my pain was not in vain lol.